The 5(ish) types you’re sure to meet at a hostel
Hostels are a melting pot of freeks, try-hards, the well adjusted and well affected.
There are a lot of normal and not so normal people using the international hostel system. Whether in Amsterdam or Paris, Sydney or Berlin, you’re sure to meet any one of these hostel archetypes on your travels around the world.
Mystical Traveling Warrior (MTW).
The MTW has a vague age, little name and no sense of humor — an age away from home has left this man hardened. There are very few female MTWs — this is a life that appeals to a man, possibly one traveling from or to love. Listening to stories from these men can be draining or exhilarating depending on your mood.
Hostel First Timer (HFTs).
First timers have an enthusiasm to mingle that could freshen your breath. Despite appearances, they treat the hostel ‘family’ like a face-sucker from Alien.
The most common hostel personality archetype, The Drunk can be charming up until the point he or she pisses their pants.
While sex is on the mind of most men at any given hostel at any given time, The Sex Pest stays at hostels just to fuck.
The local is of the city and staying at the hostel for reasons never really made clear. He’s always the guy who knows a guy who can hook people up with shitty cocaine and there is always conjectured argument over where he’s staying in the hostel just to make a profit.
A general unkempt appearance characterised by the lack of shoes — even in an European winter — and rolling tobacco. Not to be confused with A Hipster. The Hippy may introduce his or herself using ‘Namaste‘. Can accessorize with guitar, ukulele, bongos.* Along with the local, the Hippy may be a source of weed.
*Hipsters claim Banjos.
These different personalities are not mutually exclusive. For example, The Drunk and The Sex Pest have a number of cross-over characteristics. The First Timer ends up almost always becoming a Sex Pest after half a look from a disinterested European girl, and then usually ends up being The Drunk after an unsuccessful and short stint as the Sex Pest.